1. "I love hiking"
No shit. Let me guess, you like puppies too. And funnel cakes. Everyone likes hiking, puppies and funnel cakes, right? Stop being so generic.
2. "I love to travel"
You fuck off!!! It's really hard to find someone who likes to travel!
3. "I am looking for a partner in crime"
This from 1/4 of all men's profiles on Match.com. Are you really? Maybe you should go hang out at the Brown Jug on a Friday night, I'm pretty sure any patron there will go splits on some illegal activities with you.
4. "I am really looking for a girl with an amazing personality who makes me laugh and is witty."
Uh huh, and my arse is a star. If that were true I would have been married by 18.
5. "It is really hard for me to write about myself"
Right, it is hard for you to write about yourself, but it's funny how when we go on a date you have no problem monopolizing the conversation. In person your favorite topic seems to be yourself, so I'm not sure why it's difficult for you to write that same boring shit down.
6. "I am funny."
Let others be the judge of that one. I mean, my profile IS funny, which is more effective than trying to prove you're funny by stating, "I am funny".
7. "Looking for someone to show me around the city..."
Go to a bookstore, go to the travel section, pick up a Lonely Planet.
8. Typos.
They are everywhere.
9. Shirtless pictures.
Ok, I like that part.
10. Overuse of exclamation marks! Or using emoticons! :-)
Seriously, are you gay? (no offense gay friends xoxox!!! :-))
Recent Comments